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Posted on 12.5.23

Hey Turds! We don’t know about you…but the holidays are flying by for us. We’ve been spending most of our time cooking for loved ones and just trying to keep up with this busy time of year. Chris joined the Krewe of Rolling Elvi and had a blast getting soaked in the Children’s Hospital Christmas Parade! We’re also excited about our Staff Holiday Appreciation Party! We’ll be at the Rivershack Tavern (on the east bank) on Wednesday 12/13 from 6 – 9 pm. Come join us for a drink and help us celebrate all things Liberty Barbers! We hope you and your loved ones have a safe and healthy holiday season! Please enjoy this issue of the Polished Turd!    

C & J

TYE… Our resident artist and bad boy, Tye Anderson, really hit the ground running over here. Despite breaking his phone and other annoying things, he kept it moving with a good attitude. It’s not easy managing one schedule, never mind two…all without a phone! He really is a kid wizard!

HANNAH… Fun fact…did you know that Hannah is afraid of water…and lots of other things in general? She is also most likely to accidentally love-match her friends and she loves a good mystery. If you really want to win her heart, tell her how much the 90s mean to you and that the 70s suck. 

JENNY… Jenny has holiday fever and just loves this festive time of year. She won’t fully admit to being a Christmas person, but she gets in the spirit with decorations and baking up sweet treats for her friends and family. She’s also been picking up some freelance bookkeeping work, so keep her in mind if you need support in that area.  

CHRIS… Fishing season is back, but you wouldn’t know it based on how little fishing he’s been able to do. Fa la-la, la-la.

DEBY… Miss Deby is doing her thing on Wednesdays and Saturdays over here at Liberty through this holiday season. The long drives to and from the north shore are getting burdensome, so her days coming uptown are numbered. She’s still ironing out her plan but no matter what she decides, we wish Deby all the best!

MOXIE… Moxie has so much to say that she is taking over this issue’s gripes and gratitude section! Just you wait to hear about how her mommy ruined Christmas. How can she continue her reign as EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH LITERALLY EVERY MONTH when people keep doing scary stuff!? It’s just not right.

SPOTLIGHT… We have a special spotlight for this holiday edition. As you might already know, we are providing holiday gift bags to the youth incarcerated at the JJIC. Since 2020, we have partnered with Ubuntu Village Nola on this gift drive, and the needs have grown year over year. The youth jail is at capacity this year so we’re putting together 78 gift bags containing basic hygiene products and store-bought, sealed snacks. We’ve raised just over $400 but will likely spend close to $2,000 to finish the bags.

You might wonder why we are so committed to supporting the kids and their families who are caught up in the justice system. You might even feel hostility and anger towards these kids for the crimes and events that led to their incarceration. This sentiment is precisely the reason why we are driven to do what we do. We’re navigating extremely complicated systems and it’s natural to have very emotional responses. From our perspective it just feels like, well if not us then who? Who will support these kids and families with meeting basic needs? If these systems truly are about correction or rehabilitation, then we cannot just cast these people away and write them off as no longer deserving. We hope that other people feel this way too. If you have a little something to give, we truly appreciate your support. Please donate by visiting our Go Fund Me page: https://gofund.me/5ebec853  

GRIPES & GRATITUDE… My name is Moxie and you might remember me from being EMPLOYEE OF THE MONTH LITERALLY EVERY MONTH! I am here to formally submit that my mommy went and ruined Christmas and everything! Here I am just being great. I can beagle this way, that way…AND EVEN THE THIRD WAY, and nobody seems to care. They just keep on doing scary things and I HATE scary things. It was bad enough that I always had to share my mommy with Kimmy…a stinky gray cat who doesn’t even know how to beagle. I didn’t like it but being the greatest beagle…I allowed it. I even allowed that cat on the couch and that’s mine! But get this…mommy went and let another jerk cat move in!

He’s gross and a boy and his name is Larry. He even tried to eat my food and stole a whole turkey leg on Thanksgiving! I never get to jump up on the counter and I certainly don’t get my own turkey legs. It’s just not right. Where is the concern over me and my chonkiness!? People have barely even mentioned my adorable buns since Larry came along. I’m just so upset. But being the greatest beagle, I will try to overcome it. Afterall, I’m still grateful that I have a mommy and I do feel bad that these evil cats keep tricking her into loving them. I still have papa and even though I only have eyes for mommy, he’s warm and nice to cuddle with. He’s also way more generous with snacks than mommy; that’s not scary at all! Anyways, live, laugh, love…that’s what I say. When all else fails, just look at me in my baby penguin sweater!

Moxie Being Sad, December 2023